Connections

The Leadership Lid! Avoid the 3Bs! 12 Ways To Develop Your Leadership Capacity

Benjamin Child @bchild311

Benjamin Child @bchild311

Avoid the Leadership Lid! 3 Signs a Leader is Hitting the Limits of Their Leadership

How close are you to your leadership lid?

12 Ways Leader-to-Leader Learning Will Develop Your Leadership Capacity

  1. Vision - Thinking as a CEO and seeing the big picture. Capturing a vision of what could and should be for your organization and its people.* Getting out of the day-to-day details to enlarge your perspective.

  2. Relationships - Connecting with a trusted network of local CEOs. Leadership doesn’t have to be lonely at the top (Article). Being at the table with authentic, confidential, and competent leaders will grow your leadership. Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future. 

  3. Advice - Objective counsel from experienced CEOs to solve leadership challenges. Test your possible courses of action. Open your ideas to be refined. Get timely resolutions. Leverage the counsel from a collection amounting to hundreds of years of wisdom and experience focused on leadership solutions. 

  4. Health - Prioritizing first things first.  Investing where it counts. Mitigating who & what’s being neglected. Bridge the disconnect between surviving and thriving holistically. 

  5. Strategy - Space to think proactively. Refine your most important goals. Explore opportunities, develop action plans, and focus tactics. Define your win and plan to get there. 

  6. Innovate - Listen to best practices, fresh ideas, tools, and models that are working for others. Catching the wind from examples of success stories. 

  7. Work Smarter - What got you here won’t get you there. Look at what has to change to reach new goals. Clarify expectations, conflicts, and shifts that need to happen. Avoid team burnout and leadership bottlenecks.

  8. Accountability - Defining your commitments and action plan.  Avoiding drifting or hitting a leadership plateau. Execute with excellence in the time needed. 

  9. Feedback - Leaders are continuous learners. Define what professional development you need or desire. Close the gaps in your leadership. Gain understanding and skill through evaluated experiences to grow in weak areas. 

  10. Focus - Operate from the highest and best use of your time. Define what energizes you and what you can delegate. Go deeper in your best work. Your work and influence matter!

  11. Support - Leaders need champions, friends, and prayer partners. The CEO team will celebrate your wins and walk through the losses. You never know when hard times come unexpectedly. Even the independent bootstrap minded leader still benefits from a firm hand on their shoulder. 

  12. Courage - Leaders make the tough call. Your decisions have weight. Decisions to hire/fire team members. Launch the new product. Secure new funding. Sell, acquire, merge, liquidate, invest, or succession requires courage. Leaders need encouragement from leaders who know the weight of such significant moves. 

The Advance CEO Leadership Circle will help you get to the next level in your leadership. These are just 12 ways leaders have experienced the benefits of being in the Advance.  There are no perfect CEOs. We are always growing in our leadership and can be called to higher and deeper levels. Consider coming into a trusted circle of other CEO’s who are committed and working diligently to see their organization and its people reach their full potential.

Leaders are Lonely! 7 Strategies to End the Isolation

Photo by Bethany at Unsplash

Photo by Bethany at Unsplash

It's lonely at the top! Leaders are often surrounded by people yet feel alone in their thoughts, challenges, and dreams.  As a leader in your organization, do you ever feel that way? Well, you're not alone!

Leaders everywhere struggle with the reality of this issue. Isolation is truly epidemic within organizations, churches, and even families due to a lack of authenticity. All leaders need some authentic engagement or their influence will suffer. So, what can you do today? Here are 7 Engagement Strategies to help end your isolation.

Strategy #1 - Rebuild Team Trust - Broken trust will kill the conversation.  The health of your conversation will clearly define the health of the relationship. It is far too common once trust is broken a leader makes an inner vow that declares, “I will never trust like that again”. Whether the context is personal or professional the vow remains.  There’s a fundamental question that has to be answered in a situation where trust is been compromised. Can trust be rebuilt?  I have facilitated many team sessions and consistently see the answer is split down the middle.  There’s a belief that says once it’s broken it can never be repaired. I encourage leaders to believe that while it takes time, trust can be restored and rebuilt. What’s your answer to this question? For your answer will determine how lonely you will be as a leader.

Strategy #2 - Create a Culture of Authenticity - Culture reflects the spirit and values of the organization. Culture is borne by the actions, strength, health, and clarity of the leader. People are looking for authenticity in shared values and consistency of your actions with your stated values. Authentic leaders attract great people who will do the same. Start today sharing more of what matters most to you. You are the banner carrier of the culture. The way you lead and coach your team will permeate the organization. When you do communicate with your team share a story that illustrates what values reflect your core beliefs and insights into your actions. Your story will invite your team to tell their stories. Environments that provide open conversations will build a great culture. Then you’ll find connecting points with your team beyond just the bottom line.

Strategy #3 - Seek Objective Counsel  - Leaders get pulled in many directions. They have a lot of voices in their life. Some of the primary voices of influence are the leader’s direct reports, management team, or even the board of directors. They are team members yet the demands of their roles and responsibilities limit their objectivity. Finding constructive feedback and good counsel can be challenging. Motives are quickly revealed that cross the line of serving their interests above your own or the good of the organization. Where do you go to find objective feedback? It may take time but there is someone within your circles of relationships who is available, competent, and trustworthy. Objectivity helps minimize confusion and clarifies the needs of the leader and team. Engage by finding someone who has nothing to gain or lose from an issue. Learning from their wisdom and experience will help you gain confidence in leading your team.   

Strategy #4 - Align your Interests, Hobbies, and Passions with a Community - Leaders are busy! Often, the tyranny of urgent tasks creates reactive habits in our work life. Reactive work leaves little margin for proactive, strategic thinking and actions. When we finally pause to catch our breath after a demanding project or near impossible year-end goal we’re exhausted. It’s a pattern that may go on for months or even years. Your zest for life may be sucked dry and may have you feeling alone. Can you relate? If so, I encourage you to rekindle that inner or soul fire by reminding yourself of what you love to do outside of work. If you’re too far removed from the answer then ask a few people who have an insight into your life “when do you see me smile the most?” It’s a great question to ask friends and families to help identity what makes you come alive. Identify your interests, hobbies, and passions. Then call a few friends, plan a time to build some memories, and have some fun. Refreshing yourself may bring that smile back to the surface again.

Strategy #5 - Commit to a Leadership Peer Group - Most leaders know the value of a credible, competent, and knowledgeable consultant who’s dialed into the details of your organization. Their feedback can make a significant difference to your strategy, direction, and health of the organization. Now take the value of that consultant and multiply by 12. What did you get? A peer-to-peer leadership team. It’s a collection of CEOs, key executive leaders, and entrepreneurs often with 15-20 years of experience in leadership and their industry. Now you have 200-300 years of wisdom, understanding, and a fresh perspective on the issues at hand. It’s a collective counsel instead of a single voice. In addition, it’s counsel built around a community of friends who weigh in on the opportunities and challenges of life. As a facilitator of a CEO and key leadership team in Colorado, I’ve seen first hand that such a peer group is rare yet if found can be priceless to an isolated leader.

Strategy # 6 - Get a Coach - All leaders have blind spots. No matter your intelligence, EQ or IQ, we can’t see all the angles. We need objective feedback from someone other than a ‘Yes man.’ It’s exhausting to have the final decision rest with you, the leader, without some genuine push back. Executive and performance coaches get into your business. They ask the tough questions. On the surface it may seems threatening, but it's actually refreshing because often leaders have fooled themselves as well as their team. A good coach will help define the real issues so you can focus on the right priorities. Once the priorities are declared a coach will help get you moving. One of the greatest symptoms of isolation is immobility or indecision. Leadership requires taking risk. Isolated leaders are stuck leaders. A coach will help you get moving!

Strategy #7 - Find a Trusted Friend- The most trust relationship are the ones with whom you can share your greatest fears and dreams. When you do it is powerful in sharing but so much more in the celebrating when those dreams come true.  Regarding your fears let’s be honest everyone has them. I’ve stood in many team meetings, retreats, and even church events and asked ‘how many of you worry?’ Every hand goes up. You are not alone in your temptation to fear. The compromise of character and carnage that results would be mitigated if troubled leaders had a friend. We’re back our first point of building trust but at another level. Here’s one of the most powerful and provoking questions you can ask a leader, do you have one person with whom you can share your secrets? Asked another way, do you have someone with whom you can share your dreams and your fears? If you are feeling lonely as a leader may be one of your greatest goals in the next year is to evaluate your friendships then move to the next level of trust. For the lonely leader finding a trusted friend may be the most challenging pursuit of all 7, yet once found the most rewarding for your effort. (Get more questions and ways to build stronger friendship in Russell’s book the Conversationalist.)

All 7 strategies may seem simplistic and self-explanatory. Yet, I would challenge you with a quick personal assessment. How would you measure yourself in these 7 Strategies? Rate yourself on a scale of 1-10 with 1 being completely isolated and a 10 being your best possible engagement. Your answers will give you a quick indication of where you need to start first. A low score in all areas simply reveals the reality of your isolation. A high score celebrates your engagement as a healthy leader who’s likely surrounded by a great team. Say no to isolation! Take the challenge, pick one strategy, and get engaged.

The Gift of Gratitude!... Strategy to Minimize Stress!

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Thanksgiving week is one of my favorite times of the year. It invites an opportunity to reflect, spend time with our dearest people, and give thanks. I say this with the understanding that the holidays can bring their own stress as well in complicated family relationships and the ever-increasing advertising pressure to distract us with Black Friday deals of things that we want but may not need. Let’s keep our perspective a little higher and not allow anything to rob us from the real gift of the season. As we enter this week, let us be reminded of the gift of gratitude.

Giving gratitude will strengthen your priority relationships!

Gratitude is a discipline. It requires mental space, intentionality in reflection, and some honesty with your own heart. When your emotions get the better of you, gratitude will ground you. We all face disappointments, unmet expectations, and failed commitments. Our hurt can range from heartburn to heartache. There’s a weight to the significant issues in life, work, and relationships. Left unchecked the issues may leave us unguarded and vulnerable.

Upon my own reflection, since last Thanksgiving, I have privately met with 50+ leaders for 360 feedback reviews. These private coaching sessions include a report that gives specific feedback to the leader from 5-20+ professional and personal colleagues who have given responses to their 360 assessment. The feedback comes in 3 ways. As you can imagine there are insights to help strategically define how a leader may develop. Next, there are perception gaps they need to close such as blind spots or hidden strengths. Finally, they include specific affirmations that are encouraging. The formal assessment gives written language to strengthen a leader from the inside out. It’s the gift of written gratitude!

A recurring theme in all these reviews are the effects of stress. The need for strengthening represents the possibility that something is weak, vulnerable, or unhealthy. It’s a threat to your welfare. After the push of a deadline, fiscal quarter, or semester we can be exhausted. We need recovery because our reserves are spent. We are the weakest when exhausted and stressed.

It’s impossible to be stressed and grateful at the same time.

As I work with my leaders, I continue to test this theory. It’s a discipline of focusing on what’s good instead of drifting to the worry of what’s not. For many leaders, dealing with the issues of performance, energy, and engagement reflect the long-term effects of stress. It can be chronic. Stress is specific and situational how it impacts each of us. The research from the book  Choke, which evaluates students, athletes, and high achieving leaders, gives evidence of how stress affects our brain chemistry and our abilities to perform. As a runner, I often refer to stress as mental lactic acid. We’ve got to get it out of our system or it will break us down robbing our natural strengths. Gratitude will cleanse your system of stress faster than you think. Let me suggest one timeless and timely practice.

Keeping a journal captures your words of gratitude

For 25 years, I’ve kept a journal. It’s a daily practice of reflection to ground my day. Suggesting journalling may seem commonplace, but for some, it's a first-time idea or practice. After my 360 coaching sessions, I encourage leaders to start a gratitude journal. It can begin with drafting a written response to the participants who contributed to the 360. It’s a specific way of saying thank you for speaking into my leadership. The formal feedback invites the informal sincere response. In a statement it captures, “Thank you for responding my 360, I learned in my report that I need to grow in this specific way..., I’ve committed to focus on developing as a leader in this area…, you’ve helped me get started.” Imagine for a moment if you shared this response with your manager, peers, direct report, friends, or family. What would be the impact?

Everyone values specific and sincere appreciation

Remember gratitude is a discipline and the work has a reward. I’ve heard first hand the process has been life-defining for some leaders. A gratitude journal is a place to capture specific statement, comments, even questions. It’s your private place to clarify your thinking before you share. Imagine if you took the time to write down who are the key relationships and how you are grateful for their role in your life.

How may gratitude strengthen you and the health of your relationships?

As you enter into Thanksgiving week get started capturing what you’re grateful for this Thanksgiving. Once it’s written down then you’ll be ready to give thanks at your next opportunity. That may be the real gift of this season.

Happy Thanksgiving!

*Here are my leather journals written over a 3 year period. I also recommend Moleskins if you like to keep it simple. My personal favorite that I use today is from Oaks of Wisdom, my wife’s hand-drawn journals. Enjoy!


Don't Miss this... Milestone Moments

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Capturing the significance of the season is crucial.

At sunrise today, I hiked the Lincoln Open Space. Near the overlook, I saw the red rock bench as an invitation... rest, enjoy, appreciate. There's the trail in front and behind. There's so much to consider,  where I've been and the desire to keep moving. It's a milestone moment in my life that I don't want to miss. Next week, my daughter graduates from high school. Then my oldest daughter graduates from college this fall, and my seventh-grade son just ran his first track period. Then tomorrow my nephew graduates from college.  Whew! I'm taking a deep breath to enjoy the view!

If that wasn't enough, today is another milestone moment for our family. The official launch of Oaks of Wisdom! It's a dream that's becoming a reality for my wife. She's a quiet creative that's taking her private reflections public with an open house. Oaks has been planted, watered, and ready to grow. I could not be more proud as a husband, a father and an uncle. Even in the high point of these moments, it's a discipline to stop and give thanks today. 

It's a celebration of what some people only dream for their families. I don't want to miss the significance of this moment. It's a simple yet profound invitation for you as well. 

What are the significant milestone moments that you're experiencing this year that need to be celebrated? 

Many of us are running so fast. The danger is looking at what we don't have or where we're falling short. Don't miss the significance of where we've come, but maybe more importantly, who we've shared the moment with along the way. Yes, diplomas, graduations, and launches are the moments marked by calendars, but they represent years in the making. If you find yourself today fatigue by the long road and the ascent then... 

  • Take a moment to rest. 
  • Take a moment to enjoy.  
  • Take a moment to appreciate. 

Seize the moment of celebration! Look around; see what's been accomplished, learn from the disappointments, honor those who are with you, and let gratitude enrich your life.  After your milestone moment tell a friend. Your encouragement maybe inspiration for them. 

If you need a friend to celebrate your milestone moment, drop me a note I'll celebrate with you. I'm in the clouds today! 

Enjoy the sunrise! 

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Oh My Back!!! Lumbar Support In Your Leadership

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A few weeks ago I jumped in my truck excited about something. The moment I jumped in I heard a pop in my seat. After a closer inspection, I realize the lower portion of the back had concaved. So sitting in my truck left me slouched driving down the road. These are the things you don't think about until snap, break, then slump

The irony is right after that happen we had a family trip scheduled to drive across Kansas from Colorado. After a few hours in my truck seat, I ended up jamming a jacket to provide some support. Also, I also noticed the steel bar had an interesting way of digging right into my vertebrae at the same spot. So after hundreds of miles in Kansas and hours over the next few weeks, I was developing a chronic ache that went straight to my attitude every time I got out of the truck.

The fact is I didn't have the support that I needed. 

A quick look at YouTube video I found instruction for the lumbar repair and ordered the replacement part. A few days I had plastic lumbar support for 30 bucks delivered to my house. Pulling the seat apart, a few minutes with the right tools, and some dirty knuckles my support was back 100%. The difference was instantaneous driving down the road and so was my attitude. 

Sometimes we get excited about working with our people. In our enthusiasm sometimes something goes snap. We don't know exactly know what happened, but we know something is broke. We might even go weeks and hundreds of miles in conversation before we respond. You know instinctively that your posture is off, you've got a pain in your back, and your attitude reflects your demeanor.

What support do you need in your leadership today? 

Maybe that support comes personally from a friend or family member. It may be advice from a mentor or coach. It may be feedback from a team member. There's somebody in your life and leadership circles who can help.

Take a few minutes watching a leadership video, 30 bucks in a lunch with a trusted confidant, getting your hands dirty for a few minutes by taking some action may be what's needed. 

When you do so, you may sense instant relief that's critical for your leadership. 

Plus you'll enjoy the ride a whole lot more...

If you're Stuck in your leadership, team, or organization... let the Advance help get you the Support you need to Succeed! Take the first step here...